Z o r bl o g

Gawd. I have never been so fucking glad it's Friday!

(this is a real letter that I'm giving to the woman today, names changed to protect the guilty, personal asides in italics)

Dear Mrs. Bitchy Voice Teacher,

I feel that I must write to clarify a few things.

First of all, I would like to apologize again for being rude to you. I was not trying to give you attitude, but it appears that you took it as such. It will not happen again in the future, and again, I am sorry. I don't think I should apologize for shit I didn't do but I will anyways!

Secondly, when I first started taking students to accompany, I was asking them to bring me music themselves. This proved to be difficult and that is when I asked you to bring me the music for your students who had not done so already. However, M.D. and B.H. were two of the people who did bring it to me, and therefore, their music was not included in the pile that you brought to M [my piano teacher] for me and did not have any key changes marked on it. In the future, I will be certain to ask you and/or the student to let me know of any key changes.

Lastly, I would like to thank you for the opportunity to accompany your students. I enjoy accompanying very much, and sincerely hope that in the future I will again have the chance to work with your talented students. Despite my mistakes, I see them as a learning experience and a chance to improve my shortcomings. Grovel, grovel, ass kissing noises.

Yours truly,

Zorbs